Monday, November 21, 2011

Dreams...

Fevered, I wrap myself in lies and absolutions.  I am not what I am, but a sum of the sad cliches that have led me onward.  Truth falls around me, gathering at my feet like a technicolor dream coat.  You lie?  Of course you lie.  I lie?  Sometimes, indeed, I do.  I am made of thatch and rosemary.  I am hidden from your view and lost in a forest of deceit.  I want nothing.  I need nothing.  Shadows morph into phantasms too dire to contemplate.  I tear at my skin.  I am on a quest for destruction.

Green pastures.  I remember them well.  They are memories, crushed now with skyscrapers, ash, and soot. All has been sullied.  Nothing pure remains.  I feel the needle deep in my vein and hold on for one more day.  One more chance to betray myself.  I will take it gladly.

You think I don't remember.  But I do.  In bits.  In drabs and scraps.  I remember summer fields of alfalfa and innocence.  They mock me now.  They disgust me.  I will lie in my room.  I will let the weight of lost abandon press upon my chest.  I will try to breathe and fail and my heart will pound with the sound of defeat.

9 comments:

  1. D -

    Nah, this I didn't like so much.

    T

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  2. You can't win em all, T. :) Thanks for the read.

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  3. D -

    It is not to win or to lose. I didn't care for it because of the darkness and defeat that rings through it. It is very well written. I did like the imagery of " I am made of thatch and rosemary".

    It reminds me too much of the 22nd Psalm, especially 22:12 - 22:18.

    I should say I didn't like it in the same way I don't like S&G's "I am a rock". Good song, but it depresses me. Perhaps it strikes too close to home, as does this.

    T

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  4. Thanks for your comments, T. Interesting comparison to the Psalm. I think you are right and it is a very interesting parallel. You are obviously a very thoughtful reader...I appreciate you checking out my work. There are lots of other stories obviously, and more to come. Take care.

    BTW, I have a very interesting reaction to that song...always have. And it is always different. I'm a big S&G fan.

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  5. Compact and impacting, just what a good flash should be!

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  6. Just subscribed to your blog via Google Reader. Thanks for the inspiration.

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  7. Brilliant and poetic first line. Thank you for including a link to my site on your page - shall return the favour almost immediately. Watch my space.

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