Do you want to buy a print?
I don't drink almond milk because my father was an almond tree. A cow raped my mother, so I eat beef at every meal. Wash my car with milk.
It's so irritating when people try to make a living, feed their family. It's not anything to do with you, we're just being funny people, having a laugh or two. I just want out.
My car is so electric it's not even a car. It's an old Duracell battery that I glued skateboard trucks to. I don't use any natural fibers or plastics. I am going to stand naked in the middle of this forest clearing and just vibe.
Do you want to pay for my vibing seminar?
I want a president who has star appeal. I want my senators to have nice teeth. I want Chinese concentration camps and kids in cages. I'm into composting.
Baby teeth will enrich the soil, right?
I just want to want things. Things I can't have, but can create a close approximation of with filters and funny camera angles. Do you mind if I lean against your luxury automobile? Just for one second? Tell all the thirteen-year-olds that it's mine. Blow that shit up on Social Media. Make myself real. Sell prints to rubes and noobs.
So, do you want to buy a print?