I can no longer remember sharp images. Everything has blurred itself into a frightful oblivion. I never thought anything could be worse than seeing it. I was wrong. Knowing that it is all still in there, somewhere ... that I am denied access. It is a warm, creeping anxiety.
I taste the blood. I still smell the burning.
My body remembers. The shock. Thrown ragged. My body is reminded by the pain. The pain will never go away.