tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1128469884487763839.post7500186891734787602..comments2024-03-24T11:17:10.498-07:00Comments on Unemployed Imagination.: 2 Minutes. Go!JD Maderhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13058074115809620653noreply@blogger.comBlogger76125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1128469884487763839.post-18765549728389490012018-04-30T08:49:33.224-07:002018-04-30T08:49:33.224-07:00The violence of the storm, countered by the calm a...The violence of the storm, countered by the calm afterwards. The word choices made me slow down, and re-read parts of this, never a bad thing.Gryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05807314366312038458noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1128469884487763839.post-24434229540748661822018-04-30T08:44:26.602-07:002018-04-30T08:44:26.602-07:00A little slice of a universe...intriguing. "...A little slice of a universe...intriguing. "We'd done it by stealth at first..." that hint that there is something hidden among what could be a world of today. Disturbing!Gryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05807314366312038458noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1128469884487763839.post-32035324884704483592018-04-30T08:41:43.627-07:002018-04-30T08:41:43.627-07:00The line: 'I’m more than willing to be wrappe...The line: 'I’m more than willing to be wrapped in a stone dress and throw myself into the sea to get away from it.' The rest of the piece is really good, but that line is the one that hooks me.Gryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05807314366312038458noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1128469884487763839.post-30037467029404119352018-04-30T08:39:24.538-07:002018-04-30T08:39:24.538-07:00I feel a balance here between her looking inside, ...I feel a balance here between her looking inside, and the resentment at what others wish to see. A violation and control of what isn't theirs. I think of the deep wrinkles and hidden crevices of a peach pit, and it makes it a much better choice than any other fruit seed/pit that I can think of. Excellent choice!Gryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05807314366312038458noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1128469884487763839.post-69903612497233025482018-04-30T08:35:45.176-07:002018-04-30T08:35:45.176-07:00Definitely agree with JD on the routines that can ...Definitely agree with JD on the routines that can tell so much. I also enjoyed the contrast between the two characters.Gryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05807314366312038458noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1128469884487763839.post-26544723603258509242018-04-30T08:33:23.126-07:002018-04-30T08:33:23.126-07:00Really enjoyed this piece. I'm torn between fe...Really enjoyed this piece. I'm torn between feeling the ending was rushed, and realizing that sometimes, that is how quickly the tide can turn if one of the people is willing to reach out. I am also in the group of 'I need to use scents and descriptions around it more often. Now if only I can remember to push that a bit... Well done!Gryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05807314366312038458noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1128469884487763839.post-62575449434075968632018-04-29T15:20:48.696-07:002018-04-29T15:20:48.696-07:00I saw you found it. Amazing, huh?I saw you found it. Amazing, huh?David Antrobushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08486219404600185419noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1128469884487763839.post-53049066977474511932018-04-29T15:09:21.631-07:002018-04-29T15:09:21.631-07:00Thank you, my friend. :)Thank you, my friend. :)David Antrobushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08486219404600185419noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1128469884487763839.post-16388241943653195312018-04-29T15:06:47.489-07:002018-04-29T15:06:47.489-07:00Wow, yes! I love it. Aside from the race aspect, I...Wow, yes! I love it. Aside from the race aspect, I always wondered why the word "flesh," which doesn't conjure up skin for me but the gooey parts under the skin. It's kind of gross, lol. David Antrobushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08486219404600185419noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1128469884487763839.post-972505920262595562018-04-29T15:03:39.099-07:002018-04-29T15:03:39.099-07:00Gotta ditto these guys ^^^Gotta ditto these guys ^^^David Antrobushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08486219404600185419noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1128469884487763839.post-33639316226462342362018-04-29T15:01:39.410-07:002018-04-29T15:01:39.410-07:00Right. It's like a loop of time or of video, h...Right. It's like a loop of time or of video, holding something precious you can always return to. Again, like so many others this week, so meditative.David Antrobushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08486219404600185419noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1128469884487763839.post-66838001132468164882018-04-29T14:58:57.822-07:002018-04-29T14:58:57.822-07:00Everyone is so contemplative this week! And yes, w...Everyone is so contemplative this week! And yes, what those guys said. This is a perfectly meditative piece, with true insight. David Antrobushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08486219404600185419noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1128469884487763839.post-25241168134130398502018-04-29T14:57:08.072-07:002018-04-29T14:57:08.072-07:00I love how all those yins and yangs, when one pick...I love how all those yins and yangs, when one picks up after the other and vice versa, are what holds it all together, like surface tension on water.David Antrobushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08486219404600185419noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1128469884487763839.post-33004230362547474602018-04-29T14:53:15.997-07:002018-04-29T14:53:15.997-07:00It's funny this came up as I'm editing a d...It's funny this came up as I'm editing a dark fantasy right now, and one of the characters is a wolf-man hybrid, and he identifies people by their scent, which are always imaginatively described: "Her scent of cinnamon and citrus filled the room," "The warrior's reek of iron and sweat," etc. Anyway, yes, this is great, Laurie. A great idea and perfectly executed.David Antrobushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08486219404600185419noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1128469884487763839.post-27386302800830350912018-04-29T14:30:14.572-07:002018-04-29T14:30:14.572-07:00First off, I'm sorry you're having a diffi...First off, I'm sorry you're having a difficult time. Joe. Second, this is absolutely gorgeous, somehow both melancholy and inspiring. Beautiful use of language and imagery. David Antrobushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08486219404600185419noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1128469884487763839.post-27319511629358550812018-04-29T14:28:49.283-07:002018-04-29T14:28:49.283-07:00Please, be more self-indulgent! I love seeing insi...Please, be more self-indulgent! I love seeing inside your creative mind! And I liked the whole piece! Definitely check it out, any of you who haven’t already. The link to David's blog is in his first comment.The Hermithttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04070250252384180942noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1128469884487763839.post-52071880056117251202018-04-29T14:26:29.798-07:002018-04-29T14:26:29.798-07:00Everyone else said it, which leaves me to simply s...Everyone else said it, which leaves me to simply say I loved this piece. David Antrobushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08486219404600185419noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1128469884487763839.post-23756891598606053112018-04-29T14:24:29.653-07:002018-04-29T14:24:29.653-07:00We could learn a lot from them. I’m gonna go look ...We could learn a lot from them. I’m gonna go look for the Max story! Thanks!The Hermithttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04070250252384180942noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1128469884487763839.post-66105145555631992992018-04-29T14:24:01.427-07:002018-04-29T14:24:01.427-07:00This depiction of the cycle of abuse, how we can p...This depiction of the cycle of abuse, how we can pass on our wounds to the undeserving, is powerful. David Antrobushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08486219404600185419noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1128469884487763839.post-50557332574211505152018-04-29T14:22:09.368-07:002018-04-29T14:22:09.368-07:00This is beautiful, Leland. The idea that animas do...This is beautiful, Leland. The idea that animas don't feel love and all those other emotions is ludicrous. Strangely. give Dan's story and now this, I was reading about an elderly blue heeler named Max (honesty!) who despite being partially blind and mostly deaf, saved a three-year-old girl who'd wandered from her grandparents' place in the Australian outback by staying with her all night and then leading the distraught grandparents to her the next day. That's love and duty.David Antrobushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08486219404600185419noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1128469884487763839.post-16468489008690676602018-04-29T14:17:19.771-07:002018-04-29T14:17:19.771-07:00Damn , I never learned the trick of appearing not ...Damn , I never learned the trick of appearing not high or stoned. I love all of this, but especially two details: the Ramones shirt and the expensive shoes, and the last line. David Antrobushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08486219404600185419noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1128469884487763839.post-64749801889139943232018-04-29T14:13:51.553-07:002018-04-29T14:13:51.553-07:00I wouldn't normally be this self-indulgent, bu...I wouldn't normally be this self-indulgent, but I know this kind of thing is interesting to fellow writers: I began with only an image of a man washed up on the proverbial desert island, and every little decision I made led to another that flowed out of the previous one. I swear I didn't plan anything, but it just unfolded like some poisonous tropical flower (lol, now <i>that</i> was self-indulgent!). I mean, as soon as I'd decided on the two timelines, the question arose, "How did he hear them singing?" and from that came the idea that the things in the trees were mimics, which explained how he'd been fooled. And as soon as I realized he was egotistical and misogynistic, I thought of Trump and his lawyer, so I gave him a possible redemption where he was going to bury the remains of one of the women until he forgot completely when his subconscious tells him he's in danger (so much for loyalty, right?). And the whole siren thing was meant to be a red herring, although in a way it turned out it wasn't because he <i>was</i> lured by what he thought were beautiful women singing. Also, I was going to have only a single woman, but something made me go with two, which is the only way they survived as long as they did, taking shifts for who knows how long? I freaking love the process of fiction creation, and now I've bored you with my own, I'd love to know similar details from others here (although I know not many will see this). <br /><br />Thanks for commenting, brother, and thank you Leland too, for commenting on my blog itself. As someone not all that good at plot, it's satisfying when one pretty much helps me by writing itself, lol. David Antrobushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08486219404600185419noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1128469884487763839.post-51611751259547455732018-04-29T12:48:53.952-07:002018-04-29T12:48:53.952-07:00Bless you, Friends. It's been a difficult time...Bless you, Friends. It's been a difficult time.Joseph Heschhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13217169295029029233noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1128469884487763839.post-30951430554847320442018-04-29T12:34:19.006-07:002018-04-29T12:34:19.006-07:00This comment has been removed by the author.Joseph Heschhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13217169295029029233noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1128469884487763839.post-38662113284175879742018-04-29T12:11:21.770-07:002018-04-29T12:11:21.770-07:00You guess wrong. And I do want closure. Really wel...You guess wrong. And I do want closure. Really well set up piece. And there's something about the tone/pace that pulls the tension. I really dig it. JD Maderhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13058074115809620653noreply@blogger.com